futility and the crushed snail

There’s a part of the trail by my house where I often see snails crossing. These ones are small and I assume, inexperienced, with how dangerous crossing the trail really is. Given my recent connection with snails (and what they represent in my life), I have felt moved to protect them in their potentially perilous journey from one side of the trail to the other.

Sometimes I pick them up and move them across to where it looks like they were going. This feels presumptuous, however, and I wonder whether I am messing with something I shouldn’t be (snail-abling??), or damaging them in other ways. 

Sometimes I stand guard while they are crossing, to ward off any cyclists or joggers that may rush by unaware. I let them go at their own pace and simply stay close by, taking the opportunity for some Qi Gong exercises, slow breathing, or just to notice my surroundings a little more.

Either way, I feel a sense of desperation to protect my newfound friends and give them the best chance at life.

Today on my walk I came across a little crushed snail shell. 

And I felt so sad.

Sad that I can’t save every little creature.

Sad that I can’t keep bikes from racing down the trail.

Sad that I can't force anyone to slow down, to be curious.

Sad that I can’t make people notice the fragility and beauty around them. 

And even sad that it could have been me who unintentionally set this snail up for their demise.

I couldn’t keep the snail safe.

This futility extends beyond the snail … to the destruction of the old growth trees to satisfy our material-hungry society … to the world that has lost touch with what really matters and what a gift the earth is, not something to be exploited but honoured and respected … to the people who have become so disconnected that they are blind to seeing the value in a human being and who do unspeakable things out of that place. 

There is so much wrong to right. The weight of it feels crushing and too much to bear.

And yet, how can I not do something

even if it is only helping people to notice -

to see 

one child

one tree

one snail 

at a time.